"A new study by University of California researchers, just published in the journal Psychology and Aging, surveyed 5,500 users, aged 20-95, of the dating site eHarmony and found that desire was considered just as important as companionship by those aged 60 and over.
It’s not the first, nor will it be the last, piece of research to find that sexual desire doesn’t expire.
But what’s interesting is that this has to be rediscovered again and again, as though it so contradicts the dominant narratives around both ageing and sex that we somehow can’t believe it.
Our thinking about sex has been so colonised by the gymnastic model – all acrobatic contortions, supposedly inimical to arthritic hips and dodgy knees, that the finding simply seems counterintuitive. The old saw about the most erogenous zone being between the ears is buried when this kind of position-speak prevails.
Then there’s the presumption that desire thrives on, even demands, novelty, as if it were some transnational corporation that needs to come up with ever-changing products to keep us interested (hence the cliche about passion inevitably declining in long-term relationships). We undervalue, perhaps, the experienced lover, as against the rookie." - Anne Karpf via The Guardian